Christopher and I began our week thinking that Evey would be induced on Tuesday, due to her size. Needless to say, we were excited knowing that we would finally be able to meet the daughter we'd been waiting for! As excited as I was, I was having some major conflicts with the decision to induce:
First of all, I felt as if inducing was taking the power away from God.
Secondly, I so desperately wanted the story of how I went into labor to be something to remember forever.
Finally, I felt as if inducing went against everything I believed in. I wanted my labor to be natural because it was better for Evey, better for me and I would have a greater memory of the event I'd been looking forward to. I decided at the beginning of my pregnancy that I didn't want any pain medication and despite what others said, I was determined to stick to my decision unless it was medically necessary. I knew that without an epidural or stadol, I would recover much faster, Evey would be much more alert after birth and someday, I would be able to tell her that I did everything I could to make her entrance into this world better. So the decision to medically induce my labor was quite difficult for me since I wanted her birth to be as natural as possible.
After a lot of discussion with Christopher, my mom and several mentors, I realized that my conflicts were self-made concerns and nothing to worry about in the long run. My mom explained that there was a medically necessary reason to induce and that it was possible God had told Dr. Ashmun to schedule it. My doctor felt that in order for me to deliver naturally, I would need to induce before Evey got too big. Then, I finally realized that the "big story" I wanted was just a selfish desire and that the pitocin is not necessarily a "medication" but synthetic hormones that are made to mimic what my body would do naturally, so being induced wasn't the same as receiving pain medication and wouldn't affect Evey in any way.
Christopher's sister, Renee, who was also pregnant and due on the 28th had decided that we should do everything we could to have our babies born on the same day. Her doctor at UK Hospital was on call on Thursday and was planning on inducing her if she was favorable after her check-up on Wednesday. She was planning on going to the Kentucky Theatre to see "The Princess Bride" on Wednesday, eating pop corn and getting Root Beer and she wanted us to join her. We all thought that was a neat idea, but in the end, Christopher and I decided on our own to go with whatever Dr. Ashumn wanted. Our doctor had a reason for inducing on Tuesday, and we felt that changing the day to Thursday to make the plan work was most definitely taking control of something we wanted God to be in charge of.
When we had our final check-up on Monday, I was between 2 and 3cm, still 70% effaced, but Evey had dropped to a -1 station. We were so thrilled to finally have changes and Dr. Ashmun decided that we would be okay to induce. She did, however, decide to push the date back... to Thursday. Since she was only on call one day that week, and her husband was on call quite often, that was the best way to ensure that she was the one to deliver our baby. We were rolling - and we called Renee to let her know that her plan was in effect.
After Renee's appointment on Wednesday morning, her doctor decided to bring her in that night at 11pm to put her on a slow pitocin drip in order to get her labor started.
Wednesday, July 27th
I took a half day on my last day of work so that I could finish all of my "nesting" projects around the house. Since we were going to the movies with Renee and her husband, Joel, that night, I felt like getting off work at noon would allow me to relax a little more. Before the movie, we were all going to Christopher's parents house for "the last supper" (lol) before the babies were born and we ended up talking for so long that the movie theatre sold out of tickets.
We invited Renee and Joel over to our house to carry out the plan. We own the movie, and ran to Kroger to get popcorn and Root Beer on our way home. They decided that it would be better to get some rest before they had to go to the hospital, so Christopher and I were on our own.
It had been years since I've seen "The Princess Bride" and it was so funny watching it as an adult! It was such a farce and Christopher and I laughed so hard! It was a great way to spend our final evening alone together. We went to bed early because we had to be at the hospital by 6am and we wanted to get as much rest as we could. When we were on our way to bed, I was running through the house making sure everything was perfect: the carpets had been shampooed, the dogs had been bathed, the house was completely clean and everything was ready for our new addition! For the first time in our lives, Christopher was able to tell me to stop - there was nothing else that needed to be done! What an amazing feeling that was!!
Thursday, July 28th
4:45am
Christopher and I slept really, really (surprisingly) well and woke up Thursday morning feeling refreshed and ready for a long, but amazing day. We woke up early to allow plenty of time so we didn't miss anything. I was so quiet, knowing I needed to save as much of my energy as possible for the endeavor that lay before me, but Christopher was Mr. Chatterbox! He had so much energy as we got the final items we needed for the hospital together and got on the road.
5:45am
When we got to the hospital, we arrived at the elevators and I realized that I had left my admission papers in the car - of course. Christopher told me to go on up to get checked in and he ran back to the car to get them. At the check-in, I realized that I didn't have my insurance card either. I was definitely in good shape! It's a good thing that Christopher carries a copy of my card in his wallet, but as he was pulling it out, I found mine. The registration nurse could tell we were a little bit frazzled, and rightfully so!
Since I was being induced, I'd have to wear monitors and a blood pressure cuff for the entire process, so I wouldn't be able to use the labor tub, but when we got to the nurses station, we asked if Annalisa (the instructor from our birthing classes) would be working. We were ecstatic to find out that her shift started at 7am and, at that time, she had no other patient's lined up! She was all ours!!
An old friend, Whitney Farley, was working the nurses station and was the one to take us back to our room. It was great to get to see her again. The day was starting off so amazingly. Once we were in our room, I asked Whitney to take a picture of Christopher and I while I still looked decent, but when we got the camera out, we realized that the memory card was in my laptop... in my car. I went ahead and got into my oh-so-fancy hospital gown, left my urine sample and met the nurses who would be with me until Annalisa arrived.
The hooked me up to two monitors - one to watch Evey's heartrate and the other to measure contractions. They set up my IV, and after two attempts, took my blood to make sure all of my labs were okay.
6:59am
After being poked and prodded for an hour, my pitocin drip was finally started. The nurses told me that I should begin feeling contractions within the hour and that the next time I got checked up on, it would be Annalisa to do so.
When Annalisa came in, she was so happy to be assigned to our delivery. She is 100% supportive of natural childbirth and I think she was as happy to be involved in Evey's birth as we were that she was able to. She set my pitocin to drip slowly to make the induction process as natural as possible.
7:58am
Dr. Ashmun came to check on us and see how our labor was progressing. By this time I was having little contractions, but they were more annoyances than anything else. After examining me, I was dilated to 4cm, and Evey had dropped another station to -0-. She said my cervix was very thin and she decided to break my water to really get things moving.
That was the weirdest feeling I have ever felt. I've been told that the release of pressure feels amazing, but it really just felt like I was peeing on myself.
9:42am
On the way to UK Hospital to spend the day supporting Renee, Christopher's parents stopped by Central Baptist, with his Grandmother, to see us. Even though there were only supposed to be two people in the delivery room, Annalisa allowed the Davis's and the Litt's to come in. She joined together with our family as they prayed over Evey, Christopher and myself. It was amazing to have Annalisa join us in agreement as we asked God for a successful delivery and a healthy baby. There were so many people joining us and covering us with prayer and you could definitely tell. God's presence was so evident in the delivery room the entire day and if you were one of many praying over us, I thank you with every ounce of my being!
After the Davis's left, we spent the time in between contractions reminiscing about my birth. Mom and I looked through my baby book and imagined what Evey would look like. My dad and sister, Ali, sat in the corner knitting and laughing at my reactions to the blood pressure cuff that automatically went off ever 30 minutes.
SIDENOTE: To this day, I swear that the blood pressure cuff was the worst part of labor. It felt as though every time it began to take my blood pressure, I was either starting a contraction or at the peak of one and it was incredibly painful. There were several times that the cuff had fallen around my elbow and it had to attempt and re-attempt over and over. At one point, the cuff swelled up and wouldn't go down. My hand and fingers were so swollen and blue and I couldn't feel my arm and I had to call Annalisa to come reset it. By the end of the day, every time it went off, I would cry "not again!!" Apparently, Dad and Ali thought it was hilarious and Christopher wanted to make them leave so that it wouldn't bother me that they were laughing, but by that time, my contractions were so close together and so intense that I had no idea what was actually going on around me.
12:33pm
Dr. Ashmun came in on her lunch break to see how we were doing. When she checked my progress, I had dilated from 4cm to 5 and had effaced to 80%. Evey hadn't dropped any further, but Dr. Ashmun seemed to be happy with our progress as my contractions were coming on strong and heavy (according to one of Christopher's facebook post).
Since Evey and I had to be constantly monitored, I had to stay close to the bed, but Annalisa got me up, onto the birthing ball to help me get through the labor pains and she put a second gown on me from behind so that I wasn't exposed to everyone in the room. Christopher helped me with the different breathing techniques we had learned in our classes. He was absolutely amazing. I know seeing me in so much pain and not being able to do anything about it was so difficult on him, but he was such a trooper. He stayed brave, even though he felt like breaking down, so that he would be the strength I needed to get through.
1:36pm
By this time, my contractions were really, really intense. I was feeling more pressure in my lower back, so I used the hands and knees position to help relieve it. It wasn't the most attractive position, but it definitely did the trick. Christopher's mom had come back by to see how we were doing, and at that point, I was in so much pain, I don't even remember her being there.
My Aunt Jo, who is a nurse at CB, had gotten off of her shift and came to check on us as well. Mom said she cried when she saw Christopher and I. She said we were so amazing. In the end, my labor progressed so quickly, she was able to be in the room for the entire birth, which wasn't my original plan, but I'm so glad she was able to share those memories with us!
3:00pm
By the time I was in the transition phase (dilated to 7cm), time got to be a little fuzzy. Contractions were coming so quickly that Christopher didn't have time to remove visitors from the delivery room and he definitely wasn't able to post anymore status updates to facebook, which has been my timeline for the day. After all the action was over, Annalisa told us that I went from 7cm to complete in only 15 minutes! It definitely didn't seem that quick when I was in the midst of it!
I was on the birthing ball at this point, doing everything I could to keep my breathing under control. I jokingly told Annalisa that it was a good thing it was too late for an epidural - no, my sarcastic nature was not muted by the pain of childbirth. After what seemed like hours, I told her, or more accurately, screamed, "I'm pushing and I'm gonna poop!" She did a quick exam on me and reassured me that I was still only 8cm.
ANOTHER SIDENOTE: Earlier in the day, we had talked about what position I wanted to give birth in. The typical position that you see in movies is actually one of the worst positions for giving birth. We learned in our labor classes that it's best to let gravity assist you as much as possible, so I had decided to squat. The beds at CB have a squat feature where the bottom drops away and the back sits up as straight as a board. They bring in a squat bar and when contractions start, you can pull yourself up into the squatting position.
They brought in the squat bar and got the bed ready for me. They sent the call in to Dr. Ashmun and Evey's nurse, Anna, came in to get the final touches ready for delivery. We were having our baby, and soon! I kept telling them I was ready to push and Anna swooped in to help me prevent it as long as possible. Not pushing when I felt the urge was the hardest thing I have ever had to endure. I was so close to finally holding my little girl and everyone was trying to put it off until Dr. Ashmun arrived.
When they got me into the bed, I was more than ready and I was exhausted. They were in the process of setting up the squat bar and I told them to stop because I didn't have enough energy to squat. I was comfortable where I was. Annalisa let me stay like that but said she'd have to check and see if Dr. Ashmun was okay with delivering in a sitting position as it was quite unorthodox.
The urge to push got stronger and stronger, and still sitting straightup, I told Anna she was going to have to deliver my baby and she took charge. She coached me through "birthday candle breathing," which is one deep breath in and continuous short breaths out until everything is gone. After stalling through 3 or 4 contractions, Dr. Ashmun came barrelling into the room. And when I say barrelling, I mean it. I will never forget the image of her running through the door and tripping over a chair that had been pushed in front of it to make room for the delivery table and equipment. In the midst of my pain, I literally laughed out loud.
Still stalling through contractions, I didn't realize this at the time, but the turned the spotlights on. All I knew was that I was sweltering. I was still wearing both robes from where I'd moved from the birthing ball to the bed so quickly and it was hot! I ended up having someone take both of them off of me and then someone told me my bra would be ruined if I left it on, so I had them remove that too. It was quite a sight - I was completely naked, with the exception of my monitors, on the bed sitting as straight as a board, doing my best to keep breathing.
My sister was in the room taking pictures for me because I wanted to be able to see Evey's birth. I asked her to take pictures of all the gory details so that I wouldn't feel like I missed any of it. One of the nurses offered to bring in a mirror so I could watch as it was happening and I'm so glad I agreed to it!
Finally Dr. Asmun allowed me to start pushing, and after lifting the bed a little more, agreed to my random birthing position. My first couple of attempts were pitiful and I remember hearing her reminding me how to push so that it was effective and she told me to focus on her. I looked around for her, even though she was right in front of me, it took me a while to find her. When I did, she reassured me and told me I could do it.
Annalisa and Christopher each had one of my legs and held them back to help give me leverage in my pushes. I remember holding their arms and squeezing so tightly. I heard Dr. Ashmun tell me Evey was crowning and she helped me reach down to touch her for the first time. Seeing it in the mirror, it didn't look like anything I'd expected. It was as if her head had folded up into a small rectangular shape, not round and head-shaped at all! I asked if she would slide back in when I quit pushing, and I was relieved to find out that once she was out - there was no going back.
Dr. Ashmun told me that I was going to tear and asked if I'd prefer an episiotomy. I had reasearched both previously and they were my biggest fears going into labor. An episiotomy is a clean cut and heals easier, but is worse than a level 1 or 2 tear. The risk with tearing is that you never know how bad it will be until it happens. Once we were there, I told her to do the episiotomy - I just wanted Evey out. I had to stall through more contractions while Dr. Ashmun took a pair of shears and cut me open. Christopher said that the episiotomy was the only part of the labor process that he couldn't watch. Looking back, I'm so glad I went that route, though. She was able to use a local anesthetic to numb me before cutting me open, whereas if I'd have decided to tear, it would have hurt so much more!
3:47pm
After progressing so quickly through the transition phase, and stalling through several contractions, I was finally allowed to push! I only had to push through 5-6 contractions before my little girl was born! I remember watching in the mirror as I pushed and seeing the miracle of Evey's birth. Almost everyone I've spoken to wonders how I was able to push with my eyes open, but seeing how close I was to my goal enabled me to push even harder! As I pushed, I screamed her name, over and over until she was in my arms!
Immediately after Evey was born, she was placed on my chest to instigate our bond through skin-to-skin contact. Holding her for the first time took my breath away (or maybe it was all that pushing!). She was covered in blood and vernix, and she was more beautiful than anything I had ever seen! I kept crying, "my baby, my baby" and I couldn't believe she was actually in my arms! One of the nurses told me to hold on tight because she was so slippery and I replied that she wasn't going anywhere. Now that I had her, I wasn't letting her go.
It was the most amazing feeling I had ever experienced, and I'm crying even now just thinking about it! After experiencing her birth firsthand, I don't know how anyone doesn't believe in God. It was truly a miracle!
Since my sister-in-law was in labor at UK Hospital, Christopher's parents were there supporting her while Evey was born. In order for them to still be included, my mom had called his while I was pushing and put the phone on speaker so she could hear. Once I had Evey held close, she gave me the phone and all I could talk about was how beautiful she was. Between cries, I just kept telling her, "Cathy, she's beautiful!" I don't even remember what she said back, my mind was definitely pre-occupied!
4:00pm
Dr. Ashmun let me know she was going to give me a lidocaine injection to numb me before stitching up my episiotomy. When she did, I twitched because of the pain, so they sent Evey over to her nurses to be weighed, measured and cleaned up. Christopher went with her and, although I don't remember doing it, I asked my mom to stay with me.
I've never had stitches before, but that was probably one of the weirdest sensations I've ever felt. Even with the lidocaine, it was painful, but I kept my eyes on Evey the whole time. While they were still cleaning me up, I saw the nurse hand our daughter to Christopher, and that's when I lost all control. After seeing how proud and wonderful he looked with her in his arms, I started sobbing and the tears were flowing uncontrollaby. He brought her over so I could see her until I was able to hold her again.
Finally, they were done torturing me and it was time to feed my daughter for the first time. I, most willingly, took Evey back into my arms and Annalisa helped me get set up for the learning process. By this time, they had laid my bed back so I was in a more comfortable position and ready for the challenge.
After a couple of unsuccessful tries, Evey finally got latched on and was nursing away. She was a natural and ate for 45 minutes on the first try! While we were feeding, the people who were in our waiting room came in to see us.
Evey's god-parents, Jason & Naomi Colliver were the first in the room. Naomi came over and told me how excited she was. Looking back, I think the only time I've seen her happier was when her daughter, Lucy, was born last February. I was definitely happy to join her in the amazing world of parenthood!
Christopher's grandmothers were there as well, and even though it went against the way they were raised, they came over to sneak a peek at Evey. When they were having children, it wasn't such a public event, so seeing me breastfeeding was a little uncomfortable for them, I'm so glad that they came over to see her.
My Aunt Jo, who was in the delivery room for the whole birth, said she's never been so proud. She said that I was her new hero. I'm so glad she was able to share the joy of the day with us, it definitely created a bond between the two of us that wasn't there before.
Lastly, my second mother, Susan, was waiting for her arrival as well. Susan and my mom had gone through pregnancy and birth together ages ago when I was born, and it meant so much to have her there when my daughter was born. In all my life, I've never felt as loved as I did seeing all these people who mean so much to me come through to see the amazing little girl we had worked so hard for!
Finally, the crowds left and it was just our family - me, Christopher and Evey - for the first time, and we were able to catch our breath. It was a whirlwind of events, but the most amazing whirlwind I've ever been in.
Annalisa got us ready to move over to our room in the Mother-Baby wing, but before she did, she asked if she could pray over our family. She said that Evey's was the most beautiful birth she'd ever been a part of. We have never felt so covered in prayer as we did over the course of that day and it made the day so special! It felt so amazing being pushed in the wheelchair through the halls of the hospital. We were congratulated by everyone we passed, and I was so close to tears.
After the longest day of our lives, we spent the evening in awe of what God had done for us through the life of this child. Holding her that night, was like holding pure innocence. She was absolutely perfect and we couldn't have asked for anything better!
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